Have you ever felt sad for being lucky? I know the question sounds strange. And it is strange. But, if you have been through what I have been through, then you’ll understand that it’s as much real as it is strange. It is strange because you should be happy if you have been lucky. And obviously, you will be sad if you feel that you are unlucky. However, for me, it’s been different. I have been a very lucky person. Yet, I’m now feeling sad for being so lucky.
I grew up as a very lucky kid. I always received love and care from my parents. I grew up together with my siblings, cousins and friends who always admired and adored me. And till date, my family has been always there for me, which is something I should be proud of. Obviously, I feel blessed to have such a beautiful family and supportive friends. Nevertheless, I’ve not been able to be happy enough.
As a kid, I was always surrounded by people who loved and cared for me. And, now, as an adult, I’m still surrounded by people who love and care for me. But, maybe I feel too loved and cared for. And this feeling didn’t come suddenly after ages. This thing probably started growing up inside me when I was a kid. And by the time I became an adult, the feeling turned rock solid.
I had an opportunity to study at a good school. I didn’t have to cry for good food and good clothes. And my friends always wanted to spend a lot of time with me, and always praised me for my talent as well as my personality. My family always felt proud of my character, and talked highly of my versatility. Even my relatives praised me a lot for being a nice person. And as of now, I’m married to someone who is ready to sacrifice a lot for me. She loves me so much. And she always appreciates me for who I am.
My parents raised me in such a way that I never had to complain. I never felt ignored. I never felt discriminated. Though I grew up in a huge family, I never lacked anything. I was always loved. And since my childhood till my adulthood, I was always surrounded by wonderful friends who were always there when I needed. And now, I have a wife who has given me everything I could expect from a spouse. Yet, I’m sad. I’m sad because I received everything but could give nothing.
I’m at my age where many people would already have a successful career. People of my age have given so much of happiness to their families. They are able to give back to their loved ones. Husbands of my age have already given their wives some of the best moments of their lives. And here I am. I have neither served my parents enough nor I have made my wife feel like a queen. I received love from everyone – family, friends and partner. Yet, I could give them nothing.
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